Supposedly, it takes 21 days to break a habit so for those of you who have been determined to crush it straight outta the gate this New Year, let me be the first to congratulate you—WOOT! Day 22!
I for one struggle with resolutions, I tend to gravitate more toward Ann Voskamp’s words:
“Maybe what we’re really craving isn’t so much New Year Resolutions—as much as we’re seeking Soul Solutions: SOULUTIONS.”
I’m just not an urgent person. This can wear heavily on my husband’s heart, but he knows my quirks and he champions me out the door most mornings—especially now during the perpetual gray that seems to go on and on without any end in sight.
Recently on an extended drive, my girl shared her fears of being late for dance class, to which I confidently replied, “Honey, don’t worry we won’t be late, we are actually early!”
To which she responded, “Momma—WHAT IS EARLY?”
There are moments in life that we expect to be humbled, but this sweet question sent me into panic and laughter all at the same time. My nearly 7 year-old has absolutely no comprehension of what early is! I sheepishly explained to her that it basically means that we get some place before we are intended to be there.
She squealed, “That’s Amaaaaaaaaaaazing!”
Eventually when the afterglow of being ‘early’ wore off, and my blushing cheeks returned to brown, I realized our quirks can spark change or conversation. In my case both occurred, I felt empowered to be more punctual due to the sheer overflow of delight following my daughter’s new found revelation, but it also got me thinking about the way we tend to beat ourselves up about that places we are broken or flawed.
We want to mask them, or even pretend that they aren’t even there at all. The Japanese practice an art called: Kintsugi where broken pieces of pottery are seamed together with veins of gold. The patched up brokenness is what makes this art so priceless and beautiful. It isn’t a replacement piece; it is a celebration of what has emerged from what should have just been shards. This is healing my friends, when we can step out of the shadows with our cracks, scars, and stories, and still have the courage to say—“Wait, please wait for the light to catch the gold in me!”
So talk about your chips and cracks. Ask the uneasy questions, and before you rush in and try to fix everything remember—you are panning for gold and that takes sifting. Sometimes you’ll need to wait and shake and sift again.
For the last couple years, Stu and I have picked a word of the year. It is kind of a touch point during the rocky spaces of our life when we find ourselves needing a moment to reboot and remember what we are all about. This year we landed on the word: Satisfied.
I spent much of last year dissatisfied. I felt unhappy with my health and ways my body failed me. I felt overburdened by an endless array of first world problems: bills, time constraints, surface relationships, and the crushing weight of undiagnosed pain.
This year is different! Not because all of our circumstances have changed, but because we are fighting to stay in the land of Hope where scripture breathes, and bleeds a holy satisfaction that can never be stolen or forged.
“For he satisfies the longing soul, and the hungry soul he fills with good things.”